Thursday, March 11, 2010

Outsiders II

This is the second part of Outsiders. I know I'm two days late with it but I finished correcting it only now. Unfortunately my corrector/proof reader is starting to fail me miserably so I will need to find somebody else soon or it will all take more time. The third part is going to come up in a month as I promised (plus I realized next month the 9th is a Friday so it would be 2 stories in one day and I am trying to avoid that for now at least)

By Sunday I will try to post one of my original stories. One which I started writing last year - one of the first one which I took really, really seriously. This will be a good occasion to finally finish it :-)

For now please enjoy Outsiders II and tomorrow another part of Fireworks is coming up!

Cheers~!
PhotoKisser

***


OUTSIDERS II


Looking in the mirror is hard. Especially when the one staring back at me is myself. I wonder if yesterday was real. It felt like a dream. The only proof of what happened were those purple and green bruises covering my body. But wherever I looked my wings were nowhere to be found. Not even one feather. Why? It is all I ever wanted. Some potential. Alex's wings are beautiful. I don't expect to have wings even half as gorgeous as his but to have even a couple of feathers would be enough.
I also have this weird feeling like I'm forgetting something important. Something happened after I saw my wings. I don't know what. And all that mafia talk. When a person is overexcited about something life just starts flowing faster and what happens in my case is that I can't really catch up to what's happening. It's sad and I hate it.
“Hey, Nick!” I heard Alex's voice from behind the door. “Get out already!” he said banging his fist against the wooden door of the bathroom.
I took the towel and drying my hair with one hand I opened the door. He was holding my shirt and gave it to me while we exchanged short glances when I was leaving the bathroom. He had his usual unapproachable aura but his eyes flickered. He looked nervous... and excited? He couldn't be... happy? There was no way I could figure him out. He was just too weird. I looked back and saw his back stiffen as he closed the door behind him.
We haven't really spoken about yesterday. In fact, I haven't seen him even once after he had pulled his trousers out of my grip and left the men's room. But life continued as if nothing had happened. For everyone except myself. It was quite cruel. I got my hopes up yesterday and now the blow is even more painful.
I pulled myself together and fixed my uniform. With new clothes at least I didn't look like some foster child. Even with my hair looking messy all the bruises were disguised with the striped black material. Good.
I stuffed all my books and pens inside my bag not even looking at what I'm taking. Somehow this sort of thing repeats itself more and more often even when I have some more time on my hands. I put on my trainers and took a glance at Alex's shoes collection. He had some expensive leather shoes, some used up sneakers and three pairs of trainers. I glanced at his three suitcases standing still untouched in the middle of the room. There was more where those shoes came from, oh yes.
I hesitated before leaving the room. I'm not really used to having a roommate. Should I be leaving him alone? I went a few times back and forth between the door and the couch until Alex peeked out of the bathroom.
“Hey, can you go ahead and get me the... umm... set C?” he asked as if he was reading my mind. “You know, the one where they always put freaky stuff... The one I used to get... There are always huge cues so I'll meet you there. And take my ID card.”
I looked at him. What the hell? He didn't sound in the least like a transfer student. More like he was attending this school for at least five years. And what the hell was set C? I didn't recall anything like that ever being at the school cafeteria.
Alex looked kind of disappointed.
“Never mind, just get me set C” he said and looked at me intensely as if trying to convey his thoughts upon me. I guess it only works one way. He can read my mind and I have no idea what he's thinking whatsoever.
Alex had a few bruises himself but there was something about him that made him look somewhat strong even after being almost beat up to a pulp.
I took my bag and left the room in hurry. There are always queues in the cafeteria. Especially since a small percent of the kids here have any idea how to cook and thus the kitchen in each segment is considered more as a hang-out rather than the room you make food in.
Our dorms are divided first into buildings and then small segments with three to five rooms each. Each room has a separate bathroom and there is a kitchen in every segment. The lucky ones sometimes have only two rooms in a segment.
The FF is actually more of a academic city rather than just a school. It's mainly for the kids who learn here and there are little families living in the city. Only those running the business. It's a really isolated place to be honest. The person running the school must be in such a great position. To be able to manipulate all the rich and powerful families in the country who are not able to see the reality behind the posh disguise. But it's their problem, I guess. I only came here because I wanted to find somebody. Nothing more.
It's a wonder how fifteen minutes can make such a difference. Usually, I arrive at the cafeteria around eight, eight fifteen when there was a huge crowd. And I have to stand in the queue like a loser. I get my meal at a quarter to nine when the lessons start at nine.
Now, the queue was a lot shorter. I glanced up at the menu, now hanging right next to me. There actually was a set C! I took one of those and a set B as well since I am a huge believer in a french breakfast consisting of cereals, milk, croissant and jam.
“You sure you're gonna eat all this, son?” the lady behind the counter asked giving me two plates.
I smiled back at her and mentioned the other meal was Alex's. I feel a lot of sympathy for the ladies working at the cafeteria. They always call you son and almost everyone hates it - especially the rich boys are deeply annoyed with it and they are very mean towards them.
I payed for the meal and looked for an empty table or somebody I knew. The second option was a lot harder to accomplish. I did however notice Bob's blond locks and following that lead I found him as well as Paul and a couple of other people sitting by a table near the coke dispensers.
“Wow, you're early!” Bob said seeing me approach. “Seems that having a roommate is having a good effect on you,” he added.
I grimaced. “Does everyone know?” I asked. Alex was after all the talk of the school and now that he was my roommate that made me the stuff of gossip as well.
“Seems so,” Paul said finishing his crispy croissant. He glared at my plate and looked up at me. I passed the plate with my own croissant and bun to him leaving only the bowl of cereals for myself. Everyday routing.
It seemed that even we didn't break the rules of gossip. Everyone was talking about Alex and so were we. Everyone was surprised to hear that I don't really know him that much and that I didn't arrange for him to be my roommate. I don't know why they would assume something like that. It was a shock even for me, maybe bigger because I could see just how amazing a person he really was. Though, apparently Bob and Paul seemed to know him more than I did.
“Speak of the devil,” Bob said suddenly and I turned around to see Alex enter the cafeteria by the entrance near our table. I was shocked to see him wear sunglasses. It made him look literary like a lady killer and I could bet my months worth of dinners that he was one as well. I glanced behind him at his wings. They looked like they had all the possible clinical work done on them. I never really thought about what happens when wings are hurt...
I felt really proud when I saw Alex's wings. No, not of Alex himself, I'm not that kind of a person. Somehow, seeing wings suddenly became a good thing. I could see things that other people couldn't. It also felt a bit like seeing the future too. I suddenly had the urge to tell somebody about it. To show Alex's wings as if they were a piece of art. Show them to Bob and Paul, tell them everything.
But I couldn't. I can't do something like that. My ability is both a blessing and a curse. And now, I didn't even know if the only person that was a bit like me, that could see them as well even had that ability. I have no idea if yesterday even happened. If it wasn't just a delusion of a person who was beaten in the head a couple times too many.
“You didn't take my card,” Alex said when he approached our table. The cards are a payment method at the campus to avoid having us buy too many things. What we pay for is controlled by our parents and the people running this place.
“I can at least pay for your first breakfast,” I reasoned with a hint of anger in my voice.
“Thanks, but this would be my second one,” Alex smiled and sat down.
Our conversation over breakfast took on different turns avoiding the subject of yesterday or Alex's past but for almost all the time he was the main subject. He is, I noticed, quite egocentric. However all the time I could see that flicker across the eyes, his attention focused on everything any of us said.
Michael and Andy, the two other guys we sometimes hang out with, joined us half way through and we peacefully finished our breakfast with them. Or so we thought when we stood up and headed towards the exit together.
We passed his table and the only thing that Bob had done wrong was glanced at Resa, the girlfriend. I know he has had a crush on her since a very long time but this time around that one look brought upon us a disaster. I'm not mad at him though. Why would I be? He likes the girl and that's all there is to it. Infatuation is infatuation no matter how big a bitch the girl is.
“What're you looking at, mates?” Christopher asked standing up. He used his fake cockney accent which he uses whenever he's annoyed or tries to scare somebody.
He noticed Michael in our group and I could already tell this was going to be a lot more complicated.
“Yo, fagot!” he shouted. “She's a girl you know!” his joke was a tragic one. Not only did he mistake who actually took a look at Resa it had no merit value. I'm amazed that something like that can escape the lips of an almost grown man.
I felt guilt cramp my stomach. After all I couldn't do anything.
Michael, although called a gayboy almost every day is not a homosexual. He's just eccentric in his own way. He brought it upon himself though. Accidentally attending homosexual parties, hanging out with gay friends and having a really gayish attitude and taste in clothes and accessories... It was inevitable.
“Back off!” Alex said coming forward.
I saw his eyes glitter with rage and his eyebrows furrow. Hands turned to fists. I felt the hair on my arms lift. Excitement, fear, anger and... anxiousness. But it wasn't Alex's fists that worried me. It was Christopher. His wings to be more exact. They were bigger. Almost the same size as Alex's if not the same. Last I remembered they were smaller. I could only conclude one thing. They grew. Over night? Before, I would think that it was Alex's win. But now I couldn't be sure. Anything could happen.
My fists moved faster than I expected. For that one moment I felt free. The moment my knuckles drilled into his cheek the force and surprise making him lose balance and fall down.
Afterwards, the feeling disappeared. Panic replaced it. I couldn't believe what I did. I couldn't have done it. But there was no helping it now. I wouldn't back down at that time. I'm not that sort of person. There would be consequences, I knew, but there was no saying sorry at that point. Everyone was looking at me.
I said nothing. I tried to think of some punch line but my mind only made up stupid things. There was honestly no point in pushing it any further.
The Captain's minions were clueless a to what should they do. Christopher however remained cold blooded for which I do have to say a word of praise. He may be a rich spoilt brat but he has some charisma. He stood up, still a bit off balance, corrected his uniform and glared at me with pure rage. His brown eyes seemed to drill into my head. For a split second I thought I saw a bit of fear and jealousy there as well.
Know your place Nick!” he said, his voice as stoic as ever. I have to give it to him: he has quite a lot of self control. “We had an agreement,” he added and I knew that this was a declaration of war. Everyone of us knew it. Alex did, Bob did, Paul did... It was only the rest of the room that had no idea what we were talking about.
I didn't answer. My slight nod was absolutely enough. And I knew that I wouldn't be able to keep the deal much longer anyway. Especially with Alex suddenly appearing at the FF. I kind of feel pity because of that, though. I may speak badly of Christopher but a part of me admires him in its own little way. He's neither an imposer nor did he lack any potential for being a leader. I still don't know what Alex's potential is. In my opinion, although I'm not really that oriented in this matter, each feather represents a certain talent and the more feathers of one kind one has the bigger the talent. This is only a speculation, though.
I glanced once more at Christopher's wings. I had no doubt about it. They were the same size as Alex's now. I headed straight, passing him. Alex, Bob and Paul were right at my side and Michael and Andy just behind us. I didn't turn around but I was sure that Michael was still in shock but smiling slightly.
Once by the classroom we started laughing and joking about what happened. Although all of us were clearly feeling strange about it we tried to hide it and calm down. In three minutes the bell was going to ring. Michael, Andy and Bob were attending a different class so only Alex, Paul and me remained.
Jackie joined us asking what happened. Jackie, full name Jacqueline Jackson is one of a few nice girls in out year. I met her through Bob and Paul because she hangs out with those two a lot. She has curly brown hair and green eyes to match. She's half French from her mother's side so she can speak very fluent French. She has a huge talent for languages. Besides English and French she also knows German, Italian, Spanish and Arabic which at the age of seventeen is very impressive. Hell, it would be impressive even if she were fifty years old.
“Nick just stood up to Christopher,” Paul explained eagerly.
“Wow! Finally! What happened?” Jackie asked not hiding her amazement.
I didn't really answer that question. People say that girls are the biggest gossipers and although it's usually the other way around if I could delay everybody knowing for even one minute I would do it.
“He hit him in the face,” Alex backstabbed me.
In any other situation I would say all the best things about him but now I just wanted to take his wings and pluck all the wings out as a payment. How could he?
Jacqueline's reaction was just as I knew it would be. After a short laugh of disbelief she noticed our serious expressions and tapped me on the shoulder with a friendly: “About time, Nick!”
I smiled awkwardly. I knew everyone wasn't too happy with my agreement with Christopher.
Fortunately, the bell rang saving me. I said goodbye to Jackie who was already rushing to her class . I tried my best to hide the relief on my face. Classes were as boring as only biology can be. What's so interesting about plant reproduction system? Sadly, it's one of the subjects I have to attend. It was my parents doing. I would rather do chemistry or physics but my father being a doctor wanted me to continue in his footsteps. They know perfectly well that it's the last thing I would ever do.
For Alex it was a lot easier. He ditched it! I couldn't even believe what he did. He went into the classroom and used the short when there was still chaos and the teachers still hadn't remembered everyone who was in the class. He approached my table and slipped out the window! It was the second floor but he somehow managed to climb down and I was the only one who realized what happened.
I have to give it to him that it was quite thoughtful of him. If he stayed on the corridor he would eventually be noticed.
I had to cover for him during the lesson. I had to send a deadly glare towards Paul who almost slipped tat he was just outside with us.
I also received a message from Christopher about him wanting to get revenge. He didn't exactly put it that way but “5 o'clock, The Mocking Spring” is quite obvious. I noticed the handwriting wasn't his.
The Mocking Spring is located in the one area we are never supposed to go to. It's in the forest by the campus. The rules are pretty specific about that one point. It's only my speculation but I think that there used to be a military base there and now there may still be some dangerous things there. Or at least it would be a very good place for a military base. It's a thick forest yet there are very little bushes. Some kids a while back found a blind spot in the CCTV's range. Little people know where it is because the information is guarded heavily by a few chosen ones and it costs a lot.
I told Alex, Paul and Bob to b ready half past four in front of my room. I already decided to leave Michael out of it and Andy as well since they were roommates and it could arouse suspicion. Michael would probably feel bad about it. He could neither fight nor run.
Paul and Bob were ready five minutes earlier, both wearing more casual and sporty clothes but, fortunately, without flashy accessories which Paul likes to add when he doesn't have to be dressed in his uniform. He does so sometimes even when he does have to wear his uniform so I guess there's no apparent rule as to when he does it.
I went out to greet them, perfectly aware of where Alex was: in the bathroom. I had no idea what he was doing but twenty minutes was a bit too much. We waited a few more moments and when there was still no sign of him I started getting really worried.
I went back inside and called Alex through the door. He didn't answer. I expected a short “I'll be right there” at least, even if it were to be lie. But there was absolutely nothing. I panicked. I pushed the handle down and tried to get in. Surprisingly, the door wasn't locked. Alex looked at my reflection in the mirror shocked. I shivered slightly when I saw his eyes empty but at the same time full of grief.
“Shit,” I said totally missing the moment. “Sorry, I'm gonna go...”
And I really, really didn't want to. I couldn't go as well. He stared at me, our eyes trapped in each other's reflections. I was surprised to find that he wasn't as athletic as I first portrayed him to be. His wings spread out from his back and there were feathers shattered on the floor next to his bare feet. All of them were covered in blood.
He turned around and rested his head on my shoulder. “They keep growing back,” I thought I heard him whisper into my ear. I may have imagined it though.
I glanced at the mirror where now only my face was visible. I pushed Alex away. I don't know why I did it. Did I think that Alex was stronger? Or was I just mad? I have absolutely no idea. It was a spur of the moment. What I do know, however, is that I was absolutely terrified afterwards. In that moment none of us were actually “us”.
I went out without facing Alex. I didn't even so much as look at him. I was thankful that Bob and Paul were not in the room and I didn't have to explain anything to them. They were outside thinking that Alex would be out in a matter of seconds. I joined Paul and Bob and a moment later Alex was with us as well. I was amazed how quick he managed to regain his cool. His cold eyes scrutinized me at first but then a smile came back to his face. I felt a lump of guilt stuck in my throat.
When Bob and Paul were leading the way I once more gathered the courage to look at Alex. He met my gaze and furrowed his eyebrows. Not in anger, however. In fact, I can swear that he was trying to thank me in his own twisted way just not knowing how to show that without words.
We reached the brick wall behind which the forest lay after about twenty minutes of walking. Half of the way we talked about normal things but when we came to the “illegal” part of the campus we kept as quiet as it was possible. It didn't work out as planned, though. We kept chuckling although there was nothing funny about our situation. Maybe except Christopher having his cheek bloody red for the whole day. His lips were bleeding a bit as well.
We reached the blind spot. Paul made sure that CCTV wouldn't capture us on film before we went out of our hiding place. He approached the wall and pulled a brick out. The three of us observed as he searched the insides of the niche and pulled out a small notebook. It was full of drawings. Paul and Bob's drawings, I thought seeing their characteristic style. When smaller they used to sneak into the forest and draw the landscapes and maps. That was our advantage over Christopher. We had the two people who knew the most about this place. Paul put the brick back in place.
We climbed the wall one after another, Bob the last making sure that nobody was watching. He was a bit lousy at it but thankfully there was nobody besides us around. We waited by the wall until Bob climbed over and I went forward. Paul grabbed my collar and immediately pulled me back.
“That way,” he pointed more to the left steering me that way. “We'll just make a short stop...”
The short stop was another hiding spot. Paul and Bob buried a small metal box in the ground under a huge willow tree. There were lots of drawings and maps inside most of which the two didn't show to me and Alex. I don't know why but Paul kept them at the bottom of the box. He did however take out a small pocket knife and gave it to Alex.
“We're not preparing for battle here!” Bob objected.
“What else do you think this is?” Paul asked with a little smirk.
“Don't push it that way Paul,” I said. “It's just sorting out a few disputes. A fight would result in nothing and Christopher knows it.”
I wasn't lying when I said that. Christopher is intelligent like many people in this school (although most of them have little realization to when they are manipulated). Resolving these things with fights is not something he would see as a necessity. Especially knowing that this wasn't a way to win with us.
Paul glanced at a photo that was on the top of the pile of notebooks and papers but before I could take a second look he quickly covered it with a few kid trinkets that he had taken out to before find the knife and another map.
We reached the Spring in a few minutes. Christopher was already there. There were five other students with him. Not the ones who usually were responsible for threatening and fighting.
We were late by about five minutes. Christopher opened his lips most likely wanting to make some comment but thought better of it. Instead he did something else, something that surprised all of us. He hit me exactly the way I hit him in the morning. I didn't fall as a part of me was probably expecting something of this sort to happen and I was subconsciously prepared. I did however feel a lot of pain and the metallic taste of blood on my lips.
“So what do you want?” I asked. For some reason I wanted this meeting to be over as soon as possible. What was so important that he had to come by this lake? Moreover, I had this weird feeling in my chest when I came here and saw the still water. I still couldn't figure out what it exactly was but it freaked me out.
Christopher proceeded onto the small bridge that reached into the lake. We followed him and so did his five friends. It was a very awkward walk. Nobody said a word and I constantly fell the gaze of the five students walking behind us on the back of my neck.
Christopher turned around at the end of the pier.
“Remind me what was our agreement again, Nick?” he said.
I bit my lips. Everybody knew we had an agreement but nobody knew what it exactly was. And I really didn't want anybody to know. It was pretty embarrassing what I would do just to stay out of trouble with him.
“You leave me alone...” I started hoping it would be sufficient. I felt the expectant gazes of everybody on myself.
“That's only my part of the agreement,” Christopher said.
“And I do anything you ask me to do once a week...” I added feeling my head fall onto my chest.
“I haven't asked you for anything for a very long time...” he continued.
I realized that was true. I don't remember being involved in anything concerning Christopher in a few weeks. At first I had been nervous but then life continued and everything was fine.
“It was a very good few weeks,” I remarked smiling crookedly. I wasn't in a mood for jokes, really.
“Have you told your little friends what was the last thing you did?” Christopher asked.
I was pale at that moment. It was the worst thing I had done. I felt like betraying everybody I felt sympathy for in the whole school. It was just a little party, something we did once a month without anyone knowing, just to have some fun and exchange a few stories. Somehow Christopher found out that something had been going on and asked me what it was. He knew I was lying when I said that nothing was out of the ordinary. So I ended up telling him. And they ruined it completely. Barged in and started bullying everybody.
“Why should I care what he did?” Alex said suddenly. “I already have a sufficient enough reason to hate him but I don't. All of us have.”
I looked at him. What was he talking about? And was he trying to save me or make matters worse? I have absolutely no idea.
Christopher furrowed his eyebrows but said nothing in reply. He just continued what he started saying earlier. “I am giving you one last chance, otherwise, this is war...”
I raised my eyebrows. Rage and confusion filled me. On the one hand I really wanted to rid myself off of Christopher's influence and on the other I didn't want to bother a war with him.
“Don't save him...” Christopher whispered to my surprise. Three of the guys immobilized Alex and Paul and the two others threw Bob into the cold water of the lake.
In those few moments time started passing quicker when it should slow down. My adrenaline levels were through the roof. Was he joking? Did he really think I wouldn't do anything? The issue wasn't Bob's inability to swim, because he obviously could, but the shock and temperature change would delay his reaction. Either way he most likely would take care of himself but it was my job as a friend to help him. Did Christopher really think that I would destroy my relationship with my friends just for the sake of being left alone?
“You suck, Chris,” I said and jumped into the water.
I could hear Alex and Paul fighting to get free and Christopher walking around making a speech about what I had done to ruin the party. But mostly what I heard was Bob bashing his hands against the water trying to keep his head above the surface. I dived into the water. I was afraid and angry and proud of myself. Suddenly it was cold and very, very quiet. Peaceful as opposed to what was going on in my heart and mind.
And with everything that was happening, everything I felt, A thought came crossing through my mind and somehow it was an undeniable truth to me. I've been here before. Not just by the lake. I've been in this situation. Saving a boy with curly blond hair from drowning. Saving Bob. Saving my friend.
I swam upwards to where I remembered Bob was. I opened my eyes as soon as my head was above the surface. Bob was now doing better, his hectic waving replaced by slow movements of his hands. I swam towards him and met with huge relief displayed on his face. Bob really wasn't the best of swimmers. He grabbed my collar and attached himself to my back like a giant spider. I could barely breathe with his hands so strongly tied around my neck. Not without effort I swam to the pier and let Bob climb up first with me following right behind Christopher was already gone, heading towards the shore and his lackeys with him. Alex and Paul were sitting on the pier still trying to catch their breaths. I could see it on their faces that they all managed to hear Christopher's story out.
I looked at the three of them together on the pier, Bob lying on his belly, Paul leaning on his hands, stretched back and Alex hunched over. And then I noticed it. Bob too had wings. They were tiny, but they were there flapping back and forth trying to dry themselves. I smiled.
There was no smile back. Paul and Alex glanced at me with a bit of disappointment and just a tiny bit of resentment. Bob's look was sad and he obviously felt pity for me.
“You actually went on a compromise with that guy?” Paul asked.
“Well... yeah... but it was in the very beginning, before I even got to know you properly,” I tried to find an excuse. But there wasn't any that would explain my cruel behavior. And I felt that my explanation only made matters worse. “And I really didn't want anything interrupting my... my...” I felt tears in my eyes. I kept them back. I knew that in just a few moments I would have three people against myself.
“Your what?” Alex asked. “What would be so important as to complicate the life of your friends so much?”
“I...” I couldn't answer. Should I tell them? Tell them that I'm still holding onto a hope that I will find my childhood friends in this rotten place.
“We're going...” Paul said and stood up.
Alex and Bob followed him. I did remember how to get back but I felt a sudden tinge of fear. And yet another question arose. Was I that big of a bastard that I had no chance of being friends with the people I like?
Bob turned around one last time before he followed Paul down the pier. “Thanks...” he whispered, obviously torn between staying with me and going with Alex and Paul. He chose the second option.
I looked at their backs. Three sets of wings flopping in the air. One big and the other ones tiny but still beautiful. I didn't try following them even though I knew that it was probably all it took to get back on their good side. Another apology, another promise and they would have given me a second chance.
It was already dark when I got back. I spent my whole journey pondering about that feeling I had in the water. It had gone the moment all the sounds came blasting into my ears. Did I really know Bob before or was it just my imagination? Did we go to the lake? Did I go alone? Did I go at all?
I sneaked back to the dorms and into my room. Surprisingly finding it empty felt really disappointing and not relieving. I went to bed immediately, wondering wether or not I would be dreaming of anything that night.  

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